Somebody’s hiding, drowning in his past. Somebody’s cold borne, she’s giving me chills.

Humpty Dumpty

Humpty Dumpty had a great fall and couldn’t put himself together again because he wasn’t from Ikea. Yups. Cause everything from Ikea can be dismantled and put back together again. Plus they come with simple huge illustrated instructions. A to B. Arms to sockets etc etc. Bet he wouldn’t have such a headache if he’s made in Sweden, Ikea style.

Or maybe he should do some research, take some pointers from stuntmen. Learn how to take falls safely. Read up on how to break falls. “Falling Off Walls For Dumpty Dummies” Maybe then he wouldn’t make such a big mess when he land, make the King and his men work harder for the breakfast you see. I have to peel my own eggs and then scramble them, why should they have the privilege of skipping a step?

He should have known better and take steps to prevent such tragedy too. It might not be so fatal an incident if he took long soaks in the hot tub. What’s the worse that can happen? Drop off a ledge, get bruised cracked, at worst. Just stand straight up, brush himself off a little and off he goes. No huge wet slimy mess. Hey no body’s perfect right? We all have our flaws… what are a few cracks? For the perfectionist, there’s always Maybelline EverFresh Concealer.

Everything wouldn’t have happened if he din climb that high. Picture this, “Humpty Dumpty sat on the… COUCH. And there he lived happily ever after. Amen!” end of story. Zilch injury. No harm done. Of course there’ll be a sequel to it “Episode Two: The Return Of The Couch Potato.” But that’s another story for another time.

And what in the world is up with that name? Wat’s with Humpty? I’m Cranky Mike cause I’m cranky, doing crazy and outrageous things most f the time. Always looney, always cranky. So. Mr. Egg head is… Muahhahaha I leave it to your vivid imagination. Hahaha Eggman can’t wait to get it on.